The Consumption of the Italian Sock Mender
The first known record of the flesh eating zombie possum came from Italy in 1277 A.D. when a local sock mender stumbled upon a barrel of soiled water. The sock mender, Mr. Giovanni Mastro, attempted to lift the barrel to remove the soiled water and bring the empty barrel home, but as he put his arms around the lid, the water parted violently and a huge possum flew up from the barrel and commenced to chew on Masto’s face, tearing out his eyes with fierce power, and as he gnawed on his body he most deliberately infected the sock mender with the zombie virus and condemning him to roam earth for all eternity hunting down fresh meat for consumption.
This document has been recorded by a flock of run away monks from a local monastery outside of Geneva. This true event is the inspiration to the Triology of the Dead movies by George Romero (for further details, view: www.imbd.com).